Chloe Muel Enamorado♥

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Seriously.
Am i born a loner or what?
Is that why i always fall into bad hands?
Because im afraid to be alone?
Is that why i dont choose?
Because aloneliness kills?

I kept losing them.
1 by 1...
1 by 1...
1 by 1...

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Can somebody tell me at least what i have done wrong
to deserve this bullshit throught my entire life.
No matter how hard i try.
I cant keep them.

I am going to stop trying.
Fuck it.

Running tru the monsoon

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

This job makes be lose all my social life!
Well, not exactly... but i haven been taking much pictures
to allow me to blog.
Heres an old entry posting it back dated.

TCC Dinner with Garey.
Im the only one eating in fact, he's only there for the desserts.
Sounds darn gay, i know.

That girly fruity drink on the left belongs to him.

This was the dessert he ordered too.
It's weird to me when guys have a sweet tooth.
Because i dont!

Then it was impromtu Ktv session with Jon joining us.
We sang and we got high.
Bla!

I need to learn to play hard!

Running tru the monsoon

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Sometime back, it was Celine's birthday.
With the usual qlx crew we head out for our usual steamboat.

I was out with Sam taking Lucas along with us.
Which is why im not in the group shot.
Kinda sad huh.
They other guys: James, Xiong, Rayner and Simon, were busy eating.

Chirsty brought her DSLR which explains the mad awesome pictures.
I might consider doing that from now on.

With birthday girl.

Then with Sam.

Im feeling all fresh and ready to move on with life.
Find a whole new path and get set for a whole new me.

Eliminating all unnecessary temptations.
Just like how i got myself today.
Im gonna do just fine achieving the better.

Wish me luck!

Running tru the monsoon

Thursday, August 05, 2010

Mummy n daddy I'm sorry.
I didn't grow up the way you want
me to be.
You taught me well. But I just
wasn't good enough for n everyone
else.
Mummy had never like me doing
extreme sports. But I go
against it because I wanted to
impressed a guy I had a crush on.
So I went ice skating n got my arm
broken. Had an operation n the
regret the later. You were there to feed
n shower me. I was only 14.

The operation left me a heavier
arm n a scar of disgust. I was
ashamed, upset n terrified.
You, paid n accompanied me
for my constructive surgery and
watch me in pain once again.

I told myself, mummy I'll be good.
No more watching me in pain.

I remember when I was learning
how to walk, I fell n I cried.
Again, you just watch n scolded
me for falling yet crying for
attention. I hated u for making
me learn the hard way.

I hated my dad as he always
mention about money. Even
when I was hospitalise. His first
concern was for the fees. Not me.

Rebellious. I started working at 14.
I wanna earn my own money.
I wanted to prove I was capable of
survival, at 14.

Everything started at 14.

Now that I'm 22.
My dad did well meeting our
material needs, holding as up
as a family.
Mummy as well did good.
Everyone is healthy n strong.

Little bro's the best.
Bringing his best in studies.

Mummy n daddy I do u no proud.
There are people out there that things
I'm cheap, low life n never good enough
for anything.
I break the rules n Your constant
reminder to protect my own reputation.
I failed again n I got hurt.
But I'm afraid of telling u,
I don't wanna upset u.

I always believe in love.
Loving everyone around u.
I put in my everything.
But why it doesn't come back
to me?

Daddy, is this why you refuse
lift me up when I fell down n bleeds?
Because I understood now.
The real world is about bleeding.
And how you bleeds determine
how you live.

Love you, Mum, Dad, lil bro and everyone.
I go beyond my limits to create a new life.
For myself n for you all.
Its time that i demonstrate my love and care for you.
Sorry i dont wanna live like you want me to.
but i make sure i meet both ends.

Running tru the monsoon

The Who